23 September
2013
I received crushing news today. I got an email from the University of the Philippines (UP) saying that I failed the admission test to the Graduate Studies in Creative Writing. Although I was expecting it, I am still heartbroken.
I'm bursting with ideas and have hundreds of pages of notes and sailing stories I want to share- extraordinary experiences full of drama, comedy, romance and suspense. I have this dream of writing a book about my sailing adventures which no Filipino has ever done it before. However, I often find myself struggling with the actual writing and don't know where to start when I think about my "book". I end up staring at my computer for hours, days, overwhelmed with the task.
What? I was dumbfounded. I read and reread the passage and still couldn't understand it. Who died? Plus "Adapt the following passage into the genre of your choice". Huh? I could not answer the question because I did not even understand it. And finally- "Do not exceed 2 pages"- puede bang one line lang (is one line ok?)? I asked the teacher for help but she was just a proctor and could not assist me.
3. Make a literary analysis of the attached short story "The First Day" by Edward P. Jones. Include a discussion on verisimilitude or the probability of truth.
Verisimi-what?! I read the seemingly simple story numerous times, turned it upside down and inside out but could not find any profound or hidden meaning in it. And even if I did, I had no idea what verisimilitude is and what probability of truth means.
We were given 3 hours for the exam. I spent an hour on Question 1 and the rest of the time grappling with 2 and 3 while the rest of the examinees were bent over their desks furiously scribbling away. For the first time in my life, I wrote a letter at the end of my test paper addressed to whoever will check it and made a pathetic attempt at explaining my incompetence and begged him/her to please oh please accept me.
Students should be experienced sailors who have logged at least 200 miles at sea. At that time, Raul and I had already sailed thousands of miles on our own without formal lessons, learning by reading and trial and error, persistently practicing in all kinds of weather, without crashing our boat or killing anyone.
In a practice session during our course, our engine broke down and no one in our boat could fix it. We anchored in Puerto Galera, Mindoro and asked for the help of this solo sailor in a catamaran since he was nearest us.
He was sixtyish, strong and lean, with stringy blond hair, reeking of body odor, and fixed our engine in minutes in exchange for a beer. He spent his adult years working as an engine mechanic in a fishing boat in his native New Zealand but boarded a sailboat for the first time in his life when he bought his catamaran 2 years ago. He set off from France not knowing how to sail and figured everything out on the go. He had been sailing- by himself- for 2 years, just arrived from Thailand, encountered pirates in the Gulf of Aden which a support helicopter blew out of the water, was jailed for carrying a shotgun for protection which he picked up illegally in Turkey. He didn't know how to read night lights and his face registered an Aha moment when we told him what they mean. He wasn't just surviving- he looked like he was enjoying every minute of it. All of us taking this prestigious and expensive course were in awe of this man who went off to pursue a dream armed only with pure guts and determination.
I will not
compare the importance of proper sailing vs. writing classes because there is
an element of danger to the former. But since I've never heard of anyone who
has been killed for bad writing, I think I will ignore my mom's advice even
if she is always right. I will allow myself a few days to mope over my
rejection then just keep on writing and hope I figure everything out on the go.
Maybe I will find out the meaning of verisimilitude along the way.
I received crushing news today. I got an email from the University of the Philippines (UP) saying that I failed the admission test to the Graduate Studies in Creative Writing. Although I was expecting it, I am still heartbroken.
I'm bursting with ideas and have hundreds of pages of notes and sailing stories I want to share- extraordinary experiences full of drama, comedy, romance and suspense. I have this dream of writing a book about my sailing adventures which no Filipino has ever done it before. However, I often find myself struggling with the actual writing and don't know where to start when I think about my "book". I end up staring at my computer for hours, days, overwhelmed with the task.
 |
|
Nine Muses by Napoleon Abueva outside the UP Faculty Center
|
A writer friend
of mine advised me to take formal writing classes to help me with structure,
crafting and methodology. I consulted someone from the Creative Writing Department
in UP, my beloved alma mater, and was told to take Graduate Studies in Creative
Writing. So I applied.
After submitting the requisite requirements such as my transcript of records, references from former employers and samples of writing work, I was surprised to find out that there is an admission test. Silly me thought that pure desire would be enough for UP to support my dream. I had no idea what the exam would be like and how to prepare. So I did what I normally do when I don't know what to do. I did not do anything.
I arrived in the test venue last September 2 half an hour early with butterflies in my stomach. It was in the "new CAL Building" which looked about 10-15 years old despite its neatness. My fellow examinees were at least half my age.
There were only 3 questions:
1. Name 2 literary works that you read recently that you feel will make for a worthwhile study of the art of writing.
Woah, that's deep, man! Tough question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. I thought long and hard and replied to the best of my abilities about Foucault's Pendulum by Umberto Eco and My Life by Keith Richards.
2. Adapt the following passage into the genre of your choice. Do not exceed 2 pages.
After submitting the requisite requirements such as my transcript of records, references from former employers and samples of writing work, I was surprised to find out that there is an admission test. Silly me thought that pure desire would be enough for UP to support my dream. I had no idea what the exam would be like and how to prepare. So I did what I normally do when I don't know what to do. I did not do anything.
I arrived in the test venue last September 2 half an hour early with butterflies in my stomach. It was in the "new CAL Building" which looked about 10-15 years old despite its neatness. My fellow examinees were at least half my age.
There were only 3 questions:
1. Name 2 literary works that you read recently that you feel will make for a worthwhile study of the art of writing.
Woah, that's deep, man! Tough question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. I thought long and hard and replied to the best of my abilities about Foucault's Pendulum by Umberto Eco and My Life by Keith Richards.
2. Adapt the following passage into the genre of your choice. Do not exceed 2 pages.
The misery of us that are
born great!
We are forced to woo,
because none dare woo us;
And as a tyrant doubles with
his words.
And fearfully equivocates,
so we
Are forc'd to express our
violent passions
In riddles and in dreams,
and leave the path
Of simple virtue, which was
never made
To seem the thing it is not.
Go, go brag
You have left me heartless;
mine is in your bosom:
I hope 'twill multiply love
there. You do tremble:
Make not your heart so dead
a piece of flesh,
To fear more than to love
me. Sir, be confident:
What is't distracts you? This
is flesh and blood, sir:
'Tis not the figure cut in
alabaster
Kneels at my husband's tomb.
Awake, awake, man!
I do here put off all vain
ceremony,
And only do appear to you a
young widow
That claims you for her
husband, and, like a widow,
I use but half a blush in't.
What? I was dumbfounded. I read and reread the passage and still couldn't understand it. Who died? Plus "Adapt the following passage into the genre of your choice". Huh? I could not answer the question because I did not even understand it. And finally- "Do not exceed 2 pages"- puede bang one line lang (is one line ok?)? I asked the teacher for help but she was just a proctor and could not assist me.
3. Make a literary analysis of the attached short story "The First Day" by Edward P. Jones. Include a discussion on verisimilitude or the probability of truth.
Verisimi-what?! I read the seemingly simple story numerous times, turned it upside down and inside out but could not find any profound or hidden meaning in it. And even if I did, I had no idea what verisimilitude is and what probability of truth means.
We were given 3 hours for the exam. I spent an hour on Question 1 and the rest of the time grappling with 2 and 3 while the rest of the examinees were bent over their desks furiously scribbling away. For the first time in my life, I wrote a letter at the end of my test paper addressed to whoever will check it and made a pathetic attempt at explaining my incompetence and begged him/her to please oh please accept me.
 |
| Proud Bareboat Skipper Certificate holders with our instructor |
As I said, I'm
not surprised that I failed the exam and I blame myself for overconfidence.
Instead of preparing for the test, I spent my time daydreaming of being back in
my minamahal kong UP (beloved UP) after 28 years with its familiar acacia-lined avenues, stately
old buildings, students sitting on the corridors studying and playing the guitar,
even the same uncomfortable wooden chairs and smelly toilets.
My mom, my number one fan and cheerleader, told me to "try and try again!" I am normally quite persistent but I now recall an interesting character I met last June 2012 when Raul and I with 4 other friends took an International Bareboat Skipper Training Course. Conducted by International Yacht Training Worldwide (IYT), the global leader in yacht training and marine certification, this course is the equivalent of earning a driver's license so you can rent and pilot a sailboat on your own anywhere in the world.
We flew in a British instructor from Thailand, the only IYT school in Asia, to Anilao, Batangas for this class. It is a 5-day intensive course with two 3" binders of lectures, classroom and water exercises, and written and practical exams. We learned advanced theories like meteorology, collision regulations, pilotage and passage planning. An interesting topic was how to read the lights of other vessels at night so you can tell its direction, length, whether it's towing or pushing something, if it's stalled, sail- or power-driven, and other crucial information required for safety.
My mom, my number one fan and cheerleader, told me to "try and try again!" I am normally quite persistent but I now recall an interesting character I met last June 2012 when Raul and I with 4 other friends took an International Bareboat Skipper Training Course. Conducted by International Yacht Training Worldwide (IYT), the global leader in yacht training and marine certification, this course is the equivalent of earning a driver's license so you can rent and pilot a sailboat on your own anywhere in the world.
We flew in a British instructor from Thailand, the only IYT school in Asia, to Anilao, Batangas for this class. It is a 5-day intensive course with two 3" binders of lectures, classroom and water exercises, and written and practical exams. We learned advanced theories like meteorology, collision regulations, pilotage and passage planning. An interesting topic was how to read the lights of other vessels at night so you can tell its direction, length, whether it's towing or pushing something, if it's stalled, sail- or power-driven, and other crucial information required for safety.
 |
| Water exercises in 20-30 knots of wind |
Students should be experienced sailors who have logged at least 200 miles at sea. At that time, Raul and I had already sailed thousands of miles on our own without formal lessons, learning by reading and trial and error, persistently practicing in all kinds of weather, without crashing our boat or killing anyone.
In a practice session during our course, our engine broke down and no one in our boat could fix it. We anchored in Puerto Galera, Mindoro and asked for the help of this solo sailor in a catamaran since he was nearest us.
He was sixtyish, strong and lean, with stringy blond hair, reeking of body odor, and fixed our engine in minutes in exchange for a beer. He spent his adult years working as an engine mechanic in a fishing boat in his native New Zealand but boarded a sailboat for the first time in his life when he bought his catamaran 2 years ago. He set off from France not knowing how to sail and figured everything out on the go. He had been sailing- by himself- for 2 years, just arrived from Thailand, encountered pirates in the Gulf of Aden which a support helicopter blew out of the water, was jailed for carrying a shotgun for protection which he picked up illegally in Turkey. He didn't know how to read night lights and his face registered an Aha moment when we told him what they mean. He wasn't just surviving- he looked like he was enjoying every minute of it. All of us taking this prestigious and expensive course were in awe of this man who went off to pursue a dream armed only with pure guts and determination.
 |
| With my Bareboat Skipper Course classmates and instructor |
12 comments:
my dear beloved sister ichay, three things:
(1) a reminder about learning technical skills--this kick-ass ancient philosopher said that if you want to learn to build a house, then start and continue building houses; if you want to learn how to play the lyre, then pick up a lyre and don't stop playing it. his point was simple: if you want to be good at something, then activate and sustain that activity. this blog that i've been following is evidence of the activation, but that is not enough. you must write more, writing must be your lifestyle. keep doing it, and the time will come when publication is automatic because your audience is growing and demanding publication. always have writing instruments with you wherever you go. even in the bathroom [for me, i would say, especially in the bathroom].
(2) knowing verisimilitude [or any other literary theory] is not a necessary condition for good writing, but it is sufficient for literary critique. my point: be thankful that you weren't accepted into the program because it's meant to make you a better critic than a writer. your only loss is not being able to attend their writing workshops, where they give you feedback about your work. there are other venues to get feedback. could you prepare a portfolio of what you consider your best writing? 3-4 short stories or 6 non-fiction essays, or a mix. please send them to me via email. i'll see about getting you some good feedback from friends who care about the craft of writing in an informal workshop this sem break.
(3) you didn't take a mental step in that anecdote about the catamaran guy: there are things that an unschooled engine mechanic can teach those who are undergoing formal training. the metaphor works for me: just as in writing, there are those who are well-schooled in sophisticated literary theories but whose writing skills are still lacking; while there are a few who simply write, and without being too conscious of the craft or the skills involved, certainly sharpen their writing skills and produce more than publishable material. they create art.
i wish for you art, dear ichay.
love,
jon
I Googled your "born great" passage and found out it's from The Duchess of Malfi by John Webster (1580-1634). Reread the passage and it still didn't help me understand it.
Dictionary.com defines verisimilitude as the probability of truth. So the question itself gave the meaning. Why they would write the meaning next to the word is puzzling to me.
For me, all good writing comes from the heart, Ichay. Your blog is good writing because you're putting emotion and truth into it.
I'd not worry about UP and just keep writing your blog. :)
Thanks Jon and Dennis for the encouraging words! :)
But YOU taught me how to write! You taught me to write as if speaking with one person - a living, breathing human being I could see, hear, smell, feel and even taste! To write with an end in mind - evoke emotion, trigger action, draw a response. Look how far your lessons have brought me, Ichay. Apart from my day job, I also teach a "writing" class at UP Fine Arts. Every Saturday, I pass on the same wisdom you generously shared with me more than a decade ago. Did I ever get to thank you?! :-)
Sounds like you are a REAL writer already, "....I often find myself struggling with the actual writing and don't know where to start when I think about my "book". I end up staring at my computer for hours, days, overwhelmed with the task."
Here is a quote i saw recently from JK Rowling, “I just write what I wanted to write. I write what amuses me. It’s totally for myself. I never in my wildest dreams expected this popularity.” http://azevedosreviews.com/2013/06/23/jk-rowlings-20-quotes-on-writing/
Good luck :)
“If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others: read a lot and write a lot. There's no way around these two things that I'm aware of, no shortcut.”
― Stephen King, On Writing
Hi, Ichay! This is Isy, Tet Puzon's friend whom you met at Triccie's birthday blowout. I have a couple of suggestions:
• I attended a seminar/workshop by Isagani Cruz, where I learned a very useful technique. (1) Set yourself a writing schedule, say 9-10 AM, Monday to Friday, and keep it at all costs. Don't worry about doing things right, just encode what's on your mind. (2) When you reach 40,000 or 50,000 words, stop writing even though you feel you're not done yet. (3) Let the manuscript sit for a while until your mind is clear, then go back and start making it better by revising, relocating, and restyling the original text. At this point, you no longer have a limit to the number of words. (4) Let the new manuscript sit again and return to it when you've cleared your mind. Refine it further. (5) Repeat the process until you're satisfied with the product. (6) Hire a good editor.
• If you still think you need some lessons in creative writing, try Barbara Gonzalez. She conducts short classes. She has a column in Philippine Star, where you can get her contact number.
If the passages in those questions reflect the type of writing you will be encouraged to produce, I'm glad you didn't take the class.
peter
If the passages in those questions reflect the type of writing you will be encouraged to produce, I'm glad you didn't take the class.
peter
If the passages in those questions reflect the type of writing you will be encouraged to produce, I'm glad you didn't take the class.
peter
After looking at those questions, I think taking that course would've ruined your fluid style of writing, and that is far more important than any probable truth. I think all you need, and just to build confidence, is a refresher of the basics. Look online?
Barbara's writing course is based on a book called "How to Write Naturally", and she teaches those techniques quite effectively. I took one class but had to drop out because of my unpredictable travel schedule. I intend to finish the 8 sessions eventually (hope she continues teaching). I found it stimulating to hear her thoughts about "creative writing". Btw, she never took a course in her whole life.
Like you, Barbara writes naturally and from the heart. If you keep writing your blogposts (that's one of her tips--just keep writing..), you will have the basis for your book! You write very clearly and obviously avoid using extra words. Your stories are already interesting and insightful as they are.
Funny thing is I would've applied for that course too, and for similar reasons--AND would have NEVER been able to answer even the first question!! (Puede ba Percy Jackson?) So thanks for the heads up.
I love your posts, I wish you would write more. Now I have to go and slay my own writing dragons.
Aww! I was rejected by UP altogether and it completely crushed me. I think it was my first real heartbreak. Haha! Ernest Hemingway's writing advice: "All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know." And I think you've been doing that all along! Keep 'em coming, Ms. Ich! Your blog is awesome :)
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